“Chivalry is dead and women killed it” – Dave Chapelle
We are living in exciting times of transgender rights movements and the takedown of misogynist rape culture. Which I agree with everybody has the right to fight for their rights but I feel #metoo #timesup will be the harbinger of its own demise. Hear me out this movement is dope. I agree with men being accountable for sexual misconduct and the double leg takedown of #rapeculture but we are living in a cultural clash of epic proportions.
We are living where #slutshaming lives alongside #metoo. We are living in a cultural space where now being a hetero sexual male is like having a target on your back. Also, what happened to common sense and social nuance? I do subscribe to the men, women communicate on differently plains but c’mon we should all know what consent taste, look and smells like at this poing. Dudes you shouldn’t whip your wiener out and start playing with your parts in front of women without consensus, no means no and adhere to the keep your hands to yourself mantra. I am not infallible, I too once upon a time have made mistakes, drank too much, been inappropriate and made unwanted advances. There’s no media outrage when I pinch a booty or catcall, “hey gurl you fine as wine” because I’m not rich and famous.
Aziz Ansari though, hollywood’s poster boy male feminist has been outted for sexual misconduct and everybodies like…
Aziz alongside Cosby, Kevin Hart, Louis C.K. have positioned themselves as “good guy” comics and were precieved as “nice guys”. We all realized Bill was putting spanish fly in those pudding pops, Kevin got too drunk too fast too extorted and Louis had a hard time not showing his hard time. Aziz is an “advocate” for women rights, wears a #timesup pin on red carpets and won a Golden globe for Masters of None where he played the architype nice guy. We’ve been here before where public personas are a stark contrast to the reality. If #metoo wants to sustain its momentum it must recognize the hyper narcissistic celebrity culture we live in and start gunning for the space that enables these men to exist not just the men! It’s like living in a burning building and blaming the fire while overlooking the gas leak, lit candles and sparky wires.
If celebrities are the symptoms, than rape-culture is the disease.
I might be on the fringe here but this latest allegation sets a dangerous precedent for the #metoo movement. It takes agency away from women and will increase a slightly more violent atomosphere for women. Men with morals will begin to feel apathethic towards #metoo. Soon we’ll start to see an exdous of “manliness” and an increase of MGTOW or men will stop hiring women altogether.
In Aziz’s case, he is what we call “thirsty”. The minute he got “Grace” into his place he was reaching for the condom and allegedly made immediately made sexual advances . Guys, even if you have dinner and invite her back to your pad that is not a social contract for DTF. Men in their 30s should now how to think in romantic situations and keep a cool head (no pun intended). This rule however does not seem to apply to powerful men. These men play by different rules where everything goes because of their social status which has protected their behavior up unitl recently. If nice guys finish last, powerful men go for straight for dat ass.
There is a caveat here. What did this young 20somehting -year-old expect from having dinner and then taking a night cap from this influential 34-year-old movie star on the first date? No, seriously what did she honestly think was going to happen after a dinner with a guy like Aziz? Netflix and actually chill?
Read story here!
There’s this weird disparity between this girl-power-wonder-woman-hear-me-roar paradigm yet when presented with an opportunity to tell a man (powerful albeit) to f##k off we get these “he said she said stories”. Women don’t expect all men to pick up your non-verbal’s and continue to whistleblow on piggish men so we know who not to associate with. Men appeal to your higher self, step your game up and stop living in your loins. As for me I’ll be be watching waiting in the wings like…